All of us visited the GAPA building today for yet another incredible welcome and show of love and gratitude. We were welcomed with a rousing song and dance (of course!) and lots of hugs. Then we sat down and there was another welcome song and a prayer. All of the women seemed to be saying their own prayer out loud but their hope and thankfulness came through with tremendous sincerity. Then they informed us that they were just about to do their morning exercises, a regular start to their weekly Tuesday get-togethers, and invited us all into the courtyard to join them. A woman in the centre of the circle led us in some of the usual full-body movement exercises, including a Xhosa rendition of “head and shoulders knees and toes” which include chest and waist, as well as some ball throwing and catching and kicking! There were also a small number of men present, and we were informed that they had recently allowed grandfathers to join GAPA and that they had hired a male manager 3 months ago. The few men somehow managed to take over the ball kicking but the manager also made a nice analogy to life – you have to anticipate that the ball is coming, then stop it, control it and choose your next direction.

When we returned indoors we went through at least an hour of introductions. One of the women whose name was Jolene broke into the Dolly Parton song as part of her introduction! There was singing and dancing for the welcome, the prayers, on the way out to exercises, on the way back from exercises, in between every introduction, for serving of the tea (roiboos or black) and sandwiches and pretty much everything else we did all day. Most of the songs are in their native language (Xhosa) and apparently many of the lyrics are quite political and awareness-raising, teaching the young to stand up to gender-based violence for example. My favourite is “Never Give Up” and the women sing with such strong, powerful, tuneful voices that you feel very lucky to be in the same room with them. Many of them, at least half, spoke good English and were able to switch back and forth from Xhosa to English without batting an eye. The feeling of sisterhood was palpable and the way they treated one another was loving, inclusive, non-judgmental and apparently without ego. Ubuntu (“we are stronger together”) is a very important part of their creed and their spirit. I enjoyed noting some of their similarities to us as well as their differences. One of the executive team arrived late because she is still caring for children at home though she is in her 70s. The woman who was chairing today’s visit was eating from a bowl of leftover salad late in the afternoon because she had not managed to sit down for lunch. Almost all of the women were wearing headdresses but with a great diversity of designs, some were wearing beautiful fan-shaped beaded necklaces, a couple had face paint, many wore big earrings, and lots of them wore glasses.

After tea and before lunch we did some bead-making. Most of the income-generating projects involve beads, knitting and crochet, or food gardening. Each woman who makes something keeps all of the money for what gets sold. Today when we bought things, one of the women came up to the purchaser and said “Thank you – now I can eat supper tonight.” They made sure that we sat alternating a Canadian visitor with a GAPA member when we were beading and when we were eating lunch. That made for a lot of sharing. It also meant that we all had different conversations with different individuals. I met two very interesting and different women. Thandi had a very abusive husband who she wanted to leave but felt she couldn’t because of her children. Then he died of a stroke 23 years ago. Since then she has been much happier. Her two daughters are now 31 and 33 years old and one of them is married to a nice man; the oldest had a twin sister who died quite young. She said, now that she is feeling healthy, safe and empowered, she sometimes wishes her husband would come back so she could give him a piece of her mind. (Actually she said she’d like to do something worse than that.) Zola was part of a “Grandmother Club” from a different region. She joined that club when she turned 60 and they immediately asked her to be the chairperson. She told me her work history. She was the first black secretary of a big local company and had eventually ended up being the personal assistant to the CEO. I asked her how she had become so strong and capable and she told me that her mother had been very strong but wasn’t educated. So when she added education to her genetics (secretarial college) it really made a difference. She admitted that leadership was very challenging and expressed disappointment that none of her other club members were willing to come along with her to this visit. She said her car is broken so she has to walk 20 minutes each way to her club’s weekly Wednesday meetings and she is saddened by the number of women who don’t make it to meetings for what she deems weak excuses (“I had to do my laundry.”) She said there is jealousy among the women in her club and a feeling that, although they like to receive the benefits, few of them are willing to give up their time for the group. I felt that was a bit of a reality check for me, that nobody is perfect and all groups have challenges, after I had been so blown away by the GAPA women.

The manager explained to us some of the many ways GAPA has become an essential part of their wider community in the 23 years of their existence. There are 35 support groups, or grandmother clubs, with a total of 600 members, all in the general vicinity of the Cape Town “slums”. Each group sends a couple of representatives to the weekly Tuesday meetings and takes back the learning to their own groups.

• ·       Their Tuesday meetings have a focus on health. They do exercises, learn about food gardening and eating of organic food, and talk about their issues. They call these issue sharing sessions “ikhupha” which translates as “coughing up” and they are encouraged to be brutally honest about the things they are worried about or need help with. The manager or the occupational therapist usually sits in on these meetings to observe what issues arise and try to arrange future presentations or immediate help, depending on their nature. Health assessments are made available for 30 rands (about $2.40) per person and there is a weekly presentation on some aspect of health.
• ·       They run an after-school care program five days per week for local children for which they charge 20 rands ($1.60) per month, and have also started a program during school holidays. They are very committed to this because the alternative is kids being home alone and unsafe for their after-school time. Some of the young girls (ages 7 – 15) came to meet us and dance for us today (on a Saturday).
• ·       They have many project partners. Recently the University of Cape Town has started sending Social Work students to them for placements. This is very helpful.
• ·       They do a lot of advocacy work to influence government policies. They get invited to events and conferences such as one coming up in June in Johannesburg, a “National Dialogue on Elderly Persons”.
• ·       HIV is no longer a big problem, although they worry about educating the young people properly. Most of their members who are HIV+ (and there are many) are on medication and understand its importance. They said that when Trump temporarily stopped their access to medication they went straight to the government to say they had to do something. If the government refuses to help when it is needed again, they will just keep advocating until they get the response they need.
• ·       Crime, drugs, alcohol abuse and elder abuse are all big problems in their communities. Recently a grandson hit his granny and blackened her eye. She reported it to GAPA, and the boy was charged and taken to court. Whenever one of these cases goes to court, a GAPA delegation goes to court too, to show support and solidarity for the victim. They are a force to be reckoned with!
• ·       GAPA had no US AID funding so this has not been an issue for them. That doesn’t mean there aren’t challenges; there are many. They have no technology and little means of transportation for some of their members who can’t make it to meetings. The secretary told me that she writes minutes for each of their Tuesday meetings longhand in a notebook and then reads them aloud for approval and for those who didn’t attend at the next meeting.

They were quite thrilled when we were introducing ourselves and they realized that several of the Canadian groups use the term “Gogos” in their name. When Meg French (executive director of the SLF) said that our mantra is “We will not rest until they can rest” it got a big cheer. We left with more big hugs. Our rides home from these days are always quieter than the rides there as people process what they have seen and felt.

Here is GAPA's Facebook post about our visit: facebook.com/share/p/19AJsEdJNi/?mibextid=wwXlfr.